Children respond to sexual abuse in different ways based on their age, frequency, and severity of the abuse, what transpired during the abuse, and who the sexual offender is.
They might not tell you that they are being sexually abused. Instead, you might notice signs though some children might show only very subtle signs while others might not show signs at all.
It’s important to trust your instincts and to remember that persons who sexually abuse children are most often family members or persons close to you or your child.
If your child shows one or more of the signs that would be listed below, it doesn’t necessarily mean they have been sexually abused but you may want to regard sexual abuse as a possibility. Talk with your child and try to find the reason behind their change of behavior.
Signs of Sexual Abuse in Children below 12 Years of age
- Emotional Change
- Your child may seem scared or show signs of anxiety/depression
- He/She is quieter or feels more distant than usual
- Cries for no reason
- Begin to wet the bed or stain their pants
- Is belligerent or seems angry for no obvious cause
- Starts having nightmares
- Is clingy
Behavioral Change
- Your child isn’t interested in playing or is avoiding particular persons or places
- Is showing harmful sexual behavior
- Is having problems sleeping
- Is eating more or less than normal and gaining or losing weight
- Is not doing well at school
Physical Change
- You might notice swelling or redness in the genital area
- Pain when urinating or going to the toilet
- Difficulty walking or sitting
- Bruises on some soft parts of their body, like buttocks or thighs
- Signs and Symptoms of a urinary tract infection, like burning while going to the toilet
- Signs and Symptoms of a sexually transmitted infection like discharge from the penis or vagina
Signs of Sexual Abuse in Teenagers
In addition to the signs listed above, you might notice these other signs in your teenage child:
- Has headaches or stomach aches for which there doesn’t seem to be a physical reason
- Get angry or upset when a specific person or place is brought up
- Has trouble developing or maintaining relationships
- Has low self-esteem
- Is confused about their sexual identity
- Is dressing differently
- Has clothing, shoes, bags, jewelry, or electronics from an unidentified source
- Is taking risks, using drugs and alcohol, causing harm to others or self-harming
- Is spending much time online and is secretive about online communications
- Is spending more time on their own than normal
- Misses a period
How Can You Tell If An Adult Is Picking A Lot Of Interest In Your Child?
Child grooming is a calculated process by which sexual offenders gradually initiate and maintain sexual relationships with victims in secrecy. On the surface, it might look like a close relationship between the offending adult, the targeted child, and you as the caregiver/parent.
By recognizing grooming behavior, you can intervene early. Here are some examples below;
- Special attention/preference given to a child
- Gift giving
- Touching or hugging the child
- Sympathetic listener
- Offers to help the family
- Gaining access via the internet
Behavioral changes are typical during the teenage years. If you have a strong relationship with your teenage child, you can help your child go through these changes and you will also be well placed to notice any concerning changes.
Dr. Favvy
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